Photo by Hamish Irvine
I won’t lie, hearing a couple's wedding vows is my favourite moment of any ceremony. I always get a little teary!
Writing your own wedding vows is a beautiful way to share your feelings with your partner before you say I do. I know that finding the perfect words to express your love can feel rather daunting, but With a little bit of guidance and some self reflection, you can easily craft vows that are heartfelt, meaningful, and uniquely yours.
Here’s how to get started:
Reflect on Your Relationship journey
Start by taking some time to think about your relationship.
Your Journey: Reflect on how you met, your first impressions, and significant moments that define your relationship.
Qualities You Love: Consider the traits you admire in your partner and how they make your life better.
Future Together: Think about your hopes and dreams for your future as a married couple.
Set the Tone and Style
Decide on the tone and style that best represents your relationship.
Tone: Do you want your vows to be romantic, humorous, serious, or a mix of these?
Style: Consider if you prefer a formal or casual style. Your vows should sound natural and genuine.
Outline Key Points
Organise your thoughts by outlining the key points you want to include.
Start with a Greeting: Begin by addressing your partner.
Express Your Love: Describe what you love about your partner and your relationship.
Make Promises: Share your promises for the future. These can be serious, funny, or a combination of both.
End with a Closing: Conclude with a final heartfelt statement or a vision for your future together.
Write from the Heart
Start writing your vows by letting your genuine feelings guide you.
Be Honest: Authenticity is key. Speak from the heart and avoid clichés.
Use “I” Statements: Make it personal by using phrases like “I promise,” “I love,” and “I will.”
Be Specific: Include specific examples and details that make your vows unique to your relationship.
Edit and Refine
Once you have a draft, refine your vows to ensure they are clear and concise or send them to me to look over them and offer guidance.
Read Aloud: Hearing your vows can help you gauge the flow and emotional impact.
Length: Aim for a length of one to two minutes to keep your vows meaningful but not too long.
Edit: Remove any redundant or overly complex parts. Ensure your vows reflect your true intentions.
Practice
Practising your vows will help you feel more confident speaking from the heart on your wedding day. Don’t worry, no one expects you to memorise them.
Rehearse: Practise reading your vows aloud several times.
While memorising isn’t necessary, being familiar with your vows will make them feel more natural.
Consider the Ceremony Context
Remember the context of your vows within the wedding ceremony.
Coordinate with Your Partner: Ensure your vows complement each other in tone and length.
Check with Officiant: Send your vows to me so I can ensure you both have gone for a similar tone and style and have vows of a similar length.
Sample Structure and Example Vows
Greeting: “Partner’s Name,”
Expression of Love: “From the moment we met, I knew you were someone special…”
Promises: “I promise to always stand by your side when times are tough and celebrate with you….
Add humour or realistic elements: “ I can’t promise to pack the dishwasher the way you like, or stop leaving half empty cups of coffee all around the house….”
Closing: “I love you more than words can express, and I can’t wait to spend the rest of my life with you.”
Example Vows
Partner 1: “Alex, From the moment we met, I knew you were someone special. Your kindness, humour, and unwavering support have made every day better. I promise to always stand by your side, to laugh with you in times of joy, and to comfort you in times of sorrow. I vow to be your partner in all of life’s adventures, big and small. I love you more than words can express, and I can’t wait to spend the rest of my life with you.”
Partner 2: “Jamie, You are my best friend, my confidant, and my greatest love. Your strength and compassion inspire me every day. I promise to cherish you, to listen to you, and to always be there for you. Together, we will face whatever life brings as partners and best friends. I am so grateful to walk this journey with you, and I look forward to a lifetime of happiness together.”
Writing personal wedding vows is an intimate and rewarding experience and can really enhance your wedding ceremony.
By reflecting on your relationship, setting the right tone, and speaking from the heart, you can create vows that capture your love for one another.
Remember, your vows are a celebration of your unique bond, so let your personality and love story shine through.
Top tip : Don’t be afraid to add a little humour to make your partner laugh. This will help them relax into the moment and feel less nervous about being vulnerable in front of your friends and family.
If you really struggle I am always happy to help you talk through ideas and find the perfect words. Even if you just have a list of reasons you love your partner I can help you turn them into something meaningful and memorable.
Hazel
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